It seems the biggest concern my students deal with is their presumption of being too ugly to attract women.
There are various sizes and shapes of insecurity, such as: Some men think they are too old. Some men think they are too fat. Some men think they are too short. Some think they're too ugly.
We should take just a moment to drive out these few myths of attraction, since they do hold many men back from having a successful love life.
Myth #1 - You must be good looking to attract girls.
All you have to do is look around at the various types of guys in this world who are dating gorgeous women to know that this isn't the case. Simply put, it is essential to look good regardless of your physical attractiveness. Is there a difference?
Although you cannot control whether you are good looking or not, however you do have control of how you present yourself. You do control how you groom and the clothes you wear, your hairstyle, how you smell and so on. These are all aspects that factor into looking good. Any man can be attractive when he controls his appearance.
Myth #2 - Women and Men Think Alike
Naturally, you and I think that everyone else sees the same things the same way in which we see others.
Take for instance that huge pimple on your forehead, you think everyone notices it, although it is beneath the skin and no one knows it is there besides you. Very few people if any will notice, while to you it is obvious.
By nature, you think a woman sizes you up in the same manner as you do her.
Incorrect.
Women have a different set of standards when determining their attraction than men have. This does not mean they have no care as to the attractiveness of a man; they just do not use physical characteristics as a means of judgment as men do.
A woman's attraction bases itself around how a man makes them feel, rather than how a man might look. This is why social status and confidence attract women. Men who make them laugh, they find attractive. Being good at what you do attracts women. Try to understand how this works. For women, looks have very little to do with all of this.
Myth #3 - Women Notice Men's Insecurities
Since we know our own selves, much better than anyone in the world ever will, we easily find and pay attention to our every single shortcoming, such as our receding hairline, weak chin, and our big ears and nose and so on.
We notice these small flaws, no matter what they may be.
And because we see it, we assume everyone else does too. But the fact is, most people aren't very observant, and unless they specifically look for something to criticize you about, they're not going to care about your insecurities, whatever they may be.
Many men may call attention to their shortcomings while trying to dismiss and diffuse the things that make them feel insecure. Consequently, all this type of behavior does is managing to call the attention of the woman to the area of insecurity; otherwise, she may not even notice it.
Besides, insecurity is very unattractive. Think about it. Then remember, in every situation it is essential to focus on your good qualities rather than any shortcomings, since the positive will outshine the negative or at least balance it more in your favor.
Myth #4 - Good Looking Guys Have It Easy
Good looking guys have their own struggles with women. Sure, being physically attractive helps them initially, but in the long run, they have the same issues other men have.
Attraction is the art of magnifying the emotional connection that a woman feels for you, when you are around, this connection will only occur when you are around her, therefore to feel those feelings she will want you to be around her.
When a man matches the physical type of man, a woman prefers she naturally gravitates towards him, simply because those features appeal to her. Those feelings go away if she considers the man to be incompatible, a jerk or a bore.
However, if you take a guy that the woman maybe isn't initially physically attracted to, and then have him make her experience feelings of fun, excitement, and pleasure - she WILL become attracted to him eventually.
This is the fundamental concept of attraction - when you make other people feel good, they will want to be around you.
Being a good looking man does not mean, you make women feel good. You simply need to learn how to mingle and interact with women.
As you lead a woman towards sexual attraction, she begins seeing you in a new perspective, despite your shortcomings or looks.
There are various sizes and shapes of insecurity, such as: Some men think they are too old. Some men think they are too fat. Some men think they are too short. Some think they're too ugly.
We should take just a moment to drive out these few myths of attraction, since they do hold many men back from having a successful love life.
Myth #1 - You must be good looking to attract girls.
All you have to do is look around at the various types of guys in this world who are dating gorgeous women to know that this isn't the case. Simply put, it is essential to look good regardless of your physical attractiveness. Is there a difference?
Although you cannot control whether you are good looking or not, however you do have control of how you present yourself. You do control how you groom and the clothes you wear, your hairstyle, how you smell and so on. These are all aspects that factor into looking good. Any man can be attractive when he controls his appearance.
Myth #2 - Women and Men Think Alike
Naturally, you and I think that everyone else sees the same things the same way in which we see others.
Take for instance that huge pimple on your forehead, you think everyone notices it, although it is beneath the skin and no one knows it is there besides you. Very few people if any will notice, while to you it is obvious.
By nature, you think a woman sizes you up in the same manner as you do her.
Incorrect.
Women have a different set of standards when determining their attraction than men have. This does not mean they have no care as to the attractiveness of a man; they just do not use physical characteristics as a means of judgment as men do.
A woman's attraction bases itself around how a man makes them feel, rather than how a man might look. This is why social status and confidence attract women. Men who make them laugh, they find attractive. Being good at what you do attracts women. Try to understand how this works. For women, looks have very little to do with all of this.
Myth #3 - Women Notice Men's Insecurities
Since we know our own selves, much better than anyone in the world ever will, we easily find and pay attention to our every single shortcoming, such as our receding hairline, weak chin, and our big ears and nose and so on.
We notice these small flaws, no matter what they may be.
And because we see it, we assume everyone else does too. But the fact is, most people aren't very observant, and unless they specifically look for something to criticize you about, they're not going to care about your insecurities, whatever they may be.
Many men may call attention to their shortcomings while trying to dismiss and diffuse the things that make them feel insecure. Consequently, all this type of behavior does is managing to call the attention of the woman to the area of insecurity; otherwise, she may not even notice it.
Besides, insecurity is very unattractive. Think about it. Then remember, in every situation it is essential to focus on your good qualities rather than any shortcomings, since the positive will outshine the negative or at least balance it more in your favor.
Myth #4 - Good Looking Guys Have It Easy
Good looking guys have their own struggles with women. Sure, being physically attractive helps them initially, but in the long run, they have the same issues other men have.
Attraction is the art of magnifying the emotional connection that a woman feels for you, when you are around, this connection will only occur when you are around her, therefore to feel those feelings she will want you to be around her.
When a man matches the physical type of man, a woman prefers she naturally gravitates towards him, simply because those features appeal to her. Those feelings go away if she considers the man to be incompatible, a jerk or a bore.
However, if you take a guy that the woman maybe isn't initially physically attracted to, and then have him make her experience feelings of fun, excitement, and pleasure - she WILL become attracted to him eventually.
This is the fundamental concept of attraction - when you make other people feel good, they will want to be around you.
Being a good looking man does not mean, you make women feel good. You simply need to learn how to mingle and interact with women.
As you lead a woman towards sexual attraction, she begins seeing you in a new perspective, despite your shortcomings or looks.
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